I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
