i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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