All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
