wat bout pragnant strippers??
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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