So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I need water and some morals
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
