Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
