Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize