ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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