i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
barbara walters just said penis...
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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