I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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