the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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