): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
