bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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