What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize