what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
