Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
i believe in u and ur pee
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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