no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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