Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
