you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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