Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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