yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
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If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
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Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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