So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
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You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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