Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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