let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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