So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
