i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
someone owes me an orgasm
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
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