I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Randomize
