He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
