I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
