That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
