Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Randomize
