idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
