she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
