She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
