Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
