Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
