I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize