well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
