whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?