i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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