a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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