Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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