Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Thank you for not boning my boss.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
don't judge my taste in strippers
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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