Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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