Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
ttyl tear gas
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
