Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
