Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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