Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
