sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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