That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize