i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
